This is about my inability to write. In the end, my motivation drops because, really, who cares? I have participated on Facebook, but these days I just don't bother. I don't really care about your horn toots, why should you care about mine? In fact, can I say that I am sick of your horn toots?
"LifeGroup meeting tonight! These people really want to grow in God!"Woopty friggin' do. I guess you're really religious if you caption it on Facebook.
"I voted today; it feels so good!"Seriously? Can't you just vote and go about your day without the selfie and note? If someone asks you if you voted, feel free to tell them, but why the voluntary admission? My all time favorite is when a pastor will tweet or post, "Great time at church today," or, "Love worshipping with my church family." To me, that's like a chef saying, "Wow, what amazing lasagna I made tonight." Or a director talking about how great an experience making a film was. I'll notice if a grip says it was great, the director seems to be tooting his own horn.
Fortunately, I don't have any friends or acquaintances who divulge more intimate information. No "I had a massive dump a minute ago, thought I'd never stop wiping," or "I've got the best wife in the whole world, she really brought it last night," shows up in my newsfeed. If they ever do, I am cancelling my account; someone else can take care of all the church's Facebook stuff.
All this to say, I guess I'm too old for this culture. I don't feel the need to tell my friends where I am - you know, "checking in." I don't feel the need to take a picture of my lunch and put it on the web (although I am tempted to share a picture of my stomach contents when they come up). I got all the, "Hey Mom, look at me!" out of my system when I was in grade school, no need to continue.
I do, however, have serious thoughts that I would like to share. I want to explore how it is that certain churches can publicly support certain politicians and no one associated with the ACLU or the Justice Department gets upset. I want to explore how it is that certain "one-party states" are drowning in debt and ruin while other semi-"one-party states" (like Texas, which has both parties but statewide offices have been dominated by one of them for 20 years) seem to be thriving. I want to explore what is right in our culture and what might be wrong, to discuss how free stuff might not be the best way to help people, whether through the church or through the government. I am tempted, at times, to share truth with ignorance, like with the recent resignation of a nationally known pastor: the church is now dissolving, and many are ignoring that the multi sites were always going to go it alone after his departure. He said that years ago. I want to step into the ignorance and to say, "Let's be fair." I don't even like the guy. What I do like is truth. In the end, I don't make the comment because in the end, it doesn't really matter.
With all the avenues for expressing our opinions, it seems that our opinions have less weight. Does anyone really believe that the news channels want to know what you think? They just want you to feel like you matter to them, when you really don't because there's no connection, no relationship.
So, what does this have to do with the blog? Well, I suppose it is the fact that, while I have something to say, I doubt anyone cares to hear it. Of course, only my family read this blog, and they care to read. I suppose the struggle is that I don't think it is worth the exercise of writing it. Who cares? Whether I get the ideas out or not, they still exist - in me. So...why write? I will if I can, but for me, the value isn't in getting it out. Most of the time, it is enough that I have thought it and shared it with the Lord. After all, who really cares about our every thought or opinion?
Probably only the one who cares about the sparrows.